I was in Church programme some time back when an Anointed Prophet of God and my spiritual Mum Rev. Oyenike Areogun asked all the couples in Dream Centre Church to say to each other (Husband to His wife, and Wife to Her Husband) “I was sent to you by God to do you good”.
That statement struck a cord in me and the Holy Spirit started stirring up a personal revelation which gave rise to this blog. I pray that you will be blessed as you read…
The definition of a Christian marriage as was revealed to me by the understanding that anointed preaching gave; is two Christians; male and female coming together with genuine love for each other into a union Divinely purposed, not for selfish reasons but with the sincere intention of doing the other a lot of good and fulfilling their divine calling, divine assignments and destiny together.
The good from a Christian wife is not limited to making a home, giving birth and fulfilling her husband’s reasonable sexual desires as some would think. A Christian wife is much more than that she is also a physical and spiritual conduit of goodness and favour for her husband. So also the Christian husband, he is not limited to only working hard to provide for his family and satisfy his wife’s needs but he is also called to be a physical and spiritual conduit for his wife.
What is a conduit? A conduit is a channel. There are physical and spiritual levels that marriages can only attain when the husband and wife have a full understanding of what they have been given individually by the grace of God to channel into that union. You would often find in the world system that a husband or wife are encouraged to or are only willing to channel the physical benefits; thinking that money, fame and fortune is all there is and they still end up unsatisfied so much so that may seek a separation or obtain a divorce. The more critical things of life are spiritual including love, joy, peace, contentment etc. Divine things are received spiritually. To have a balanced marriage one must essentially channel the spiritual into the marriage union and of course not neglect the physical.
If there is an imbalance permitted in a marriage, that marriage cannot achieve it’s full potential and the issue can be traced to lack of genuine salvation, incomplete basic life training, a distaste for wisdom, wrong ancestral flows and wrong associations.
Here is the balance that God desires for us in life and destiny:
“But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you (Matthew 6:33 KJV). It is good to note that our spiritual pursuit of God should not be motivated by the gain of rewards; but for the desire of intimacy even though we know that God is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him” (Hebrews 11:6 KJV). There is no better way to please God and enjoy the abundance of life in our marriage and life (that is in Christ Jesus) except through spiritual pursuits through the application of instructions God in faith.
The Christian husband and wife have a purpose in God to fulfill and both must understand what the purpose is and must work in harmony in fufilling the same. “For God is not the author of confusion, but of peace, as in all churches of the saints”.
1 Corinthians 14:33 KJV
God will not give a purpose to the man and his wife that do not align with each other, rather He gives purposes that ultimately complement each other. “Can two walk together, except they be agreed”? (Amos 3:3 KJV)
If the God-given purpose of the husband is conflicting with that of the wife’s or vice versa there is probably a lack of the practice of honour and love. “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it”
(Ephesians 5:22, 25 KJV)
“For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body”(Ephesians 5:23 KJV). God does not solicit role reversal in a Christian home. The husband who fears God and loves his wife will have the full backing of God as the head of his wife/home and a wife who is fully submissive to her God fearing husband, will be a woman to be reckoned with, one who never lacks Divine favour and in her life and who would have the evidenced and functional characteristics of the “Proverbs 31 Woman”.
Proverbs 31:10-31 (KJV) 10 Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.11 The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. 12 She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life. 13 She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands. 14 She is like the merchants’ ships; she bringeth her food from afar. 15 She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens. 16 She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard. 17 She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms. 18 She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night. 19 She layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff. 20 She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy. 21 She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet. 22 She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple. 23 Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land. 24 She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant. 25 Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come. 26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness. 27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness. 28 Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her. 29 Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all. 30 Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised. 31 Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.
The Christian husband and wife who think they can truly and fully enjoy the divine benefits of marriage without being fully engaged in serving God are kidding themselves. “Don’t you dare leave God out of your marriage union”!
There is very needful Divine spiritual harmony in the Christian home. No matter how physically well constructed marriage union can be, without God actively involved, that marriage will soon come crashing down. Except the Lord build the house, they labour in vain that build it: except the Lord keep the city, the watchman waketh but in vain. (Psalms 127:1 KJV)
A good wife will strive to know who her husband is before God and once she has an understanding, she gives her full cooperation to get behind her husband to fufil their associated Divine destiny. And so also the husband must seek to know his wife through the Spirit of God and cooperate with his wife correctly, truthfully and lovingly.
The husband’s and the wife’s destiny are vitally linked. The husband apart from his wife is not whole in a marriage and the wife without her husband is incomplete in a marriage. And no Christian marriage can be whole without being in harmony with the Divine.
It is a necessity that the Christian husband and wife are students of the Bible, that they consciously pursue living in spiritual harmony with the Holy Spirit and each other; and they must not neglect the physical benefits of marriage such as fruitful companionship, exchange of gifts, building a home, sex, communication, support, help etc.
A Christian marriage and home are supposed to be God’s example of the ultimate best intention for marriages to the world and God wills that we truly and fully bring our family under His Lordship, and by His Grace doing all with diligence to retain permanency in the center of His perfect will.
Prayer:
Father Lord God, help our Christian home and marriages so that we are not deficient in anyway of the bliss You’ve designed for us to have and experience. Let the testimony of our marriages be that because we have brought it under your Lordship it is greatly blessed and filled with your life and favours in every way and trouble-free in Jesus Mighty Name. Amen!
Glory be to God!
The Message Bearer
Cornelius Bella
corneliusbella 
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